The Mr. Brown Network

Tommy Habeeb... err.. Grand.

Long ago, long before Joey Greco was stabbed, there was a different host to America’s Favorite Reality Show, Cheaters… his name was Tommy Habeeb, better known to Cheaters fans as “Tommy Grand”. In many ways, we should actually thank Tommy for his contribution to television, for he was also the producer of the pilot that got this wonderful show on the air… but god… he’s an awful host.

Sure, the show pretty much hosts itself – all you really need is a voiceover guy (and they do have an excellent one in Bob Magruder) and a detective to bring the client to the confrontation – you really don’t need the host – but the host compliments the show, and is supposed to help provide for some of the show’s most interesting moments, like getting arrested, getting stabbed, or the occasional “talk to me, Gomez.” Joey Greco does this well… Tommy Habeeb, not so much. Even Jack E. Jett did better than Habeeb when he was called in to pinch hit for Joey after the stabbing incident.

Habeeb hosted the show for its first hundred episodes. Shortly after, he was terminated; a lawsuit followed alleging racial discrimination (even though he doesn’t look like any ethnic or racial minority, and he pronounces “Habeeb” like a redneck would – HEY-beeb), and now he’s relegated to re-runs, pay-per-view specials, and uncensored DVDs.

Joey Greco - God.

Joey Greco is just far more superior than Tommy Habeeb. For example, if confronting a cheater and his now obviously pregnant mistress, Greco would say something like:

Would you like to explain this love child to your fiancée?

Tommy Habeeb, on the other hand, would say something like this:

Are you pregnant? Is this baby his? <awkward silence>

It does not end there. While Joey will gladly step in and help the injured party during the confrontation, if they’re attacked, for example, Tommy will just stand by and let his overly large security guard with the cowboy hat take care of it. Joey sticks up for his clients, Tommy doesn’t.

Luckily for us, the viewer, Tommy has moved on from Cheaters; now, he promotes cheating through his show “STAG: A Test of Love“, which in my humble opinion, is an awful piece of garbage. It is nowhere near the high quality that Cheaters PIs provide us with every night on Cheaters.